Wednesday, June 10, 2009

I'm sitting sewing and watching the second season of Dexter. The rain is pelting down hard and the dogs are laid out sleeping in that way they do in the summer--you can see them soaking up the air conditioning through their skins, spread out as though they could unzip their fur and lay it on top of the vents. Wave it around to catch the breeze. There is a calamitous knocking coming from the laundry room like someone is hammering. Jesus Marimba, I think, what fresh hell might this be?

I go into the laundry room and the racket continues. I see nothing out the window--my first thought being the electric company geniuses have arrived with some insult. I walk outside and there is a great fucking woodpecker dismantling the house near the utilities connections. In that short amount of time, he's done an impressive amount of damage and revealed a carpenter bee nest.

So, I guess this means I need to put "paint the house" on the long list of crap I can't afford to do. Ack! Splpppt. Now I'm wondering if this is retribution for the yellow jacket holocaust I brought about recently.


  1. Bad Alice said...
    We had a woodpecker or two going after carpenter bees. In fact the pest folks just came today. The joys of home ownership.
    Gary Carden said...
    I have found a flaw in the marvelous improvement in my hearing brought about by a cochlear implant. Bird song is irritating! Damn, I love bird song, but with this implant, they all sound hysterical, manic. They have driven me off the deck several times until I realized that I could take the implant out. Blissful, total silence, like TV with the sound off. Now, I can read, and all the birds have become mime artists.
    Tossing Pebbles in the Stream said...
    You sound like a budding conspiracy theorist. Nature is not out to get you!

    Was it a pileated woodpecker?

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