Smokey Mountain Breakdown

...By an enormous rockslide!

Yes, it's true. In an attempt to prevent hipsters from leaking into Cocke County from Asheville, an enormous wall of rock slid down the mountain blocking all lanes of I-40 at mile marker 3 in Haywood county. Geologists blame the slide on wedge failure, where two planes of rock are levered apart by rainfall, freezing and thawing and having their respective underwears pulled up around their armpits by more physically fit rocks.

It is estimated it will take three months to completely clear the highway of debris and so will not impact the yearly hipster mating season beginning in May. The last major slide occurred on July 1st, 1997.