Sunday, April 01, 2007

Eat your heart out, V-Man!

Today was hugely productive and I'm so excited I can barely stand it!

Friend Scott comes by today and takes me out to dinner at the local Chinese. On the way he relates this amazing Friend Scott story so hillbilly gonzo in its proportions that it can only be compared to "Snakes and Taxes". So I've got an amazing, hilarious Friend Scott story to relate after this current Friend Scott story is done. All I can say is it involves a drunk and licentious 400 lb "cousin" in a mini skirt with no underwear, rosebushes, calf-tagging, iodine, a consensual gang-banging and the phrase "He's gay...let him do it!"

And I say, "Why do you hang out with these people?"

So, we go into the Chinese and who should be there but the legendary Pastor Jimmy Morrow, who Scott knows and is, of course, related to. I've been wanting to meet Jimmy ever since I moved here mainly because of my fascination with the Pentecostal Church Snakehandlers. So, I finally got my invite, not only to attend one of Jimmy's snakehandling services, but also to come by his house to view his extensive archives of snakehandling history, photos and lore! Jimmy knows more about the history and genealogy of this area than anyone. He's is a backwoods genius and has been featured on The Discovery Channel, The Travel Channel and Nat'l Geographic. I'm so honored to meet him and can hardly wait just to sit and soak up anything he wants to tell me.

So V-Man...I may not have been able to attend the amazing and drunken Feast of Snakes in Claxton with you, Eric, Joe, Zonker, Elisson, Rick, Georgia and Denny, but looks like I'm gonna have my own private Feast of Snakes. And we ain't gonna have no sissy press passes or safe bleachers or boxed in snake pits. I thumb my nose at you sir!

Snakes in a Church....coming soon to a blog near you.

11 Comments:

  1. bluemountainmama said...
    oohhh.... can't wait!! love me some snake-handlin'.....
    Anonymous said...
    From Wendy Bagwell, popular gospel comedian in the 70's- "Here come the rattle snakes!"

    "I looked over at little Jan and she's the color of cotton, and I said 'look around for the back door'. She said, 'I already looked and they ain't one!" And I said, 'reckon where do they want one?'

    The funny thing is that Little Jan is now married to Rev,. Ed Taylor of Gatlinburg Ministries!

    goat yoda!
    Paul said...
    Now there's a verse that always puzzled me - it's in a section of I forget which NT book describing gifts God's supposed to give to believing Christians.

    As I recall, the snake thing is listed alongside the ability to drink poisons without suffering any harm. Now that's one I've never seen attempted...!
    Elisson said...
    Handling snakes in church is a great opportunity to see Natural Selection in action. Be sure to getcha some pics, 'k?
    Hayden said...
    ooooh, I'm looking forward to this. wish it was video!
    Abraham Lincoln said...
    Wow. This is something else. I like your writing.
    Anonymous said...
    Actually, the phrase 'to take up the serpent' means 'to deal with Pharoah and his minions'. Pharoah was commonly refered to as 'a serpent' becasue of the snake aureas on his double crown.

    George Lamsa- who has by far *THE* best translation of Scripture out there, IMHO, also has a book 'Idioms: A Key to the Original Gospels'. Extremely good read and more correctly translates/explains a LOT of misconseptions for many popular catch phrases.

    goat yoda
    Rosie said...
    Hey Paul, the issue of snakehandling is sharply divided up here. Thus far, I've only gotten to talk to the other denominations up here. The detracters seem to believe it is irresponsible due to the fact that the death of a parent...or both parents...becomes a family and society issue when children are left parentless. There have been deaths. Anecdotally, I heard a story of one woman who died after drinking the strychnine water that they drink. I'm really excited to get a chance to hear the other side and witness exactly what this religious fervor is like and about.

    Hey Ellison...yes, I'm taking my camera if allowed. I don't think it will be a problem. I just wish I had a USB digital recorder. The music and singing in these churches is supposedly the best out there.
    Elvis Drinkmo said...
    Rosie,

    I'm going to have to check out that book on snake handling- it looks pretty interesting. We don't have any of those churches in my part of West Virginia- at least none that I'm aware of.
    Karen said...
    Oh my. those pictures are really something! When my dad was playing pro baseball back in the '40s, he went to some revival meetings, but I don't think he ever saw a snake handler. He can't hear anything right now, so I'll have to write him a letter and ask him...

    On another note, I'm tagging you--check out the lists on my blog--
    http://artinthegarage.blogspot.com/2007/04/ive-been-tagged.html
    Velociman said...
    Rosie,
    I should be gracious and congratulate you on this splendid opportunity to divine the mysteries of the handlage of serpentage, but I'm a big baby, and I'm jealous! Wahh, dammit! Please enjoy, and yes, take those pix. BTW, my fascination with roundup came from Harry Crews's classic "A Feast of Snakes", of course. You should read it sometime. SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS, sistah!

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