Saturday, September 08, 2007
As you all know, I am a liberal Democrat. I make no secret of that and believe strongly in the practice of tolerance, freedom of speech and all that jazz. At heart...I carry around all of the liberal trappings and mannerisms. It's true, I do.
Including keeping my car radio pretty much super-glued to NPR. Well, I was driving down the interstate on my way to Newport while winding around the scenic mountain passes that are my commute, when I choose to make it. Today I was off to the library to return my books and do a bit of research for a few pieces I have in the writing mill.
Anyway, my favorite radio station had a classical selection playing that I wasn't quite up to so I decided to play it dangerously and hit the search button.
It took me to Rush Limbaugh broadcasting from Andersonville, TN. Well, my gag reflex was feeling a bit sluggish so I didn't wreck the jeep trying to change the channel. And as I drove, I listened to how I was trying to destroy America and what a big liar I was.
Honestly...I wasn't bothered at all. It just slid right off the fat part of my back. I was really proud of myself. I seem to have overcome that annoying habit of screaming back at the idiot pundits on the radio and television.
But then he committed a most foul heresy. He started plugging Maple Bacon flavored coffee.
"For heaven's sake, man!" I screamed. "How many tons of pulverized oxycontin do you have to shove up your nose to think caffeinated pork is a good idea!"
I just completely lost it at that point. My gag reflex seemed to make a full recovery. I am deeply and profoundly offended.
I'm a huge fan of all things coffee and all things bacon. I'm not one of those culinary ideologues who insist that my peas not touch my carrots. But this is an abomination. Truly, it is.
I'm just saying...if we start swilling pork flavored coffee...the terrorists have freakin' won, folks.
Labels: bacon flavored coffee, humor
My daughter thinks NPR spells radio.
Also a stark raving liberal democrat (sans a gun),
Sally
I guess the disgust would wake you up in the morning...
rosie - it's terribly unfair I know, but I just have to say
"ONLY IN AMERICA!!!"
I am equally likely to crash my car while trying to get rid of an annoying radio-harangue.
We are just entering an election cycle, so I'm hearing a heap more than usual. Even on my lefty-government/student station!
I like my bacon straight, too. But when it comes to milk, pass the chocolate syrup please.
but i love the post....it made me laugh....even though i'm a non-gun toting conservative. :)
...at least he's not plugging the coffee enemas, i suppose, a la Michael Weiner/Savage...